At the Mercy of the Magic 8-Ball – Review – Comedy Central

For the rest of the day,
every decision I have to make, every question
life throws at me, I will run it
by the Magic 8 Ball and do what it
tells me. And in order
to keep the rest of the world in the dark about this
rather odd practice, I’m gonna keep the 8 Ball
here in this fanny pack. I don’t want anyone
to think I’m weird. So… Shall I head out into the world? [fabric rustling] “Most likely.” Very well then. Should I
use the men’s room? (Forrest voice-over)
As I set out
on this journey of chance, the idea of giving up
all of the day’s decision-making
responsibilities to this children’s toy
struck me as a relief… Should I help
pick this stuff up? That would be great. (Forrest voice-over)
Though one with certain risks. “No.”
Sorry. [Ed muttering indistinctly] Can I say hello
to these two people? (Forrest voice-over)
Since 1950,
the iconic Magic 8 Ball, with its mysterious triangle
afloat in an inky blue
nontoxic realm, has provided advice
and premonition to those adrift
in the inky blue, often toxic, waters of life. Can I cross the street? These “ask again later”s
are a real problem. The more I embraced
the randomness of life… Shall I share my food
with this hungry creature? (Forrest voice-over)
The more meaningful even the
smallest decision seemed to be. [clicks tongue] Should I
chase after this squirrel? (Forrest voice-over)
And I had a lot of fun. [Forrest chuckling] Where did–Okay. Should I follow him
up into the tree? [grunting] [laughing]
This is great! (Forrest voice-over)
But, of course, I wasn’t happy with all of the 8 Ball’s
decisions. Shall I have a hot dog? [fabric rustling] (Forrest voice-over)
And it soon became clear that this plastic ball
also had the capacity to complicate my family life. [phone rings]
It’s Suzanne. Okay, uh, can I answer this,
please? (Forrest voice-over)
Despite many attempts
to contact her, I had not spoken
with my ex-wife Suzanne since I gave a toast
at her rehearsal dinner, that caused her
to call off her wedding. He is constantly sleeping with
baseball groupie whores! What?
What is going on? Yes.
Yes! Yes.
Hello. Hi. Hi. (Suzanne)
Hi, Forrest, I saw you called
many times. Yeah, hi.
Hey, what’s up? (Suzanne)
Were you calling to apologize
for ruining my life again? Uh… (Suzanne)
Forrest? Yeah, no, I–just a second. Uh,
“Better not tell you now.” Okay? (Suzanne)
“Better not tell me now”? Yeah. (Suzanne)
What does that even mean? Uh… (Suzanne)
Are you sorry or not? [fabric rustling]
– Forrest. Just a second.
Just a second. “Don’t count on it.” (Suzanne)
Really? All right,
go [bleep] yourself. – Stop calling me.
– Wait, wait, wait, wait. Ask me another question.
Ask me a different question. (Forrest voice-over)
While I was ready
to talk through the issues Suzanne and I
were experiencing, it was clear
that the Magic 8 Ball was not. What?

80 Replies to “At the Mercy of the Magic 8-Ball – Review – Comedy Central”

  1. is this about people who google everything (….especially porn) instead of having friends, and eventually go crazy?

  2. I like this show a lot, especially this bit but I just hate the story of him breaking up with his wife. I think he could have come up with a much better storyline.

  3. Okay. This was the funniest show. And I'm only finding it now. I guess that is a good thing tho. All new.

  4. Where can I watch this show? I can’t find the dvds anywhere and I can’t find it on the internet either.

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