Dead Alive / Braindead (1992) Movie Review

what’s up everyone I’m the gentleman and
today I’ll be talking about Dead Alive this should be interesting do you like zombies?
do you like psycho? do you like Lord of the Rings? wait what
that’s right before Peter Jackson’s The Lord of the Rings he actually did a
zombie slapstick comedy from the early 90s called Dead Alive originally called
brain-dead it had a change its name when it came to North America because the
movie already had the rights to that name. but I don’t care about that movie, so lets just move on. Dead Alive is about this socially awkward mama’s boy named Lionel who
looks like Norman Bates’s kiwi brother and about a woman named Pacita who is
desperately looking for love she then becomes entranced by him when her tarot
cards say that she’ll meet her one true love when a certain symbol is displayed
which is what she find when she meets Lionel…. awww However, prior to this a Zoo official goes through a foreshadowing of a future Peter Jackson project; Skull Island
home of Harambee the official then retrieved this fucking
animal who looks like a certain someone’s pet, I’m correct, to bring back
to the zoo because f*** nature, you’re gonna be a publicly displayed prisoner
then. the indigenous people chase him down but then he escapes until he is
bitten by the monkey rat so he is kicked off because of Sengaya Sengaya! Sen-gaya! which is pretty bad because… this then the missing link makes his way to
the zoo where our romantic awkward couple is having their first date but
then they come across the monkey rat who then bitchslaps
a regular monkey and then just starts to eat his arm because that’s just how you
get down the zoo however the perfect zoo date is soon ruined when the mom
gets bitten by the rat monkey because she was spying on Lionel and Pacita because she’s was starting to get a little jealous of them. thanks mom I had my
first boner…. Oh in case you’re wondering about the rat monkey’s origins… well listen to this Yes… you heard right. rats… raped… Some monkeys…. yeah you show that rat
bastard. over the course of the movie the mom’s bite gradually gets worse and unfortunately becomes a flesh-eating zombie and then she eventually turns others
into them as well That’s… one way to make friends. this creates a problem for Norman Bates I mean Lionel because he now has to hide
his mom and the mess that She’s made into the basement because he doesn’t want
his mom to be taken away… serious mommy issues. she’s a f***** zombie dude let that bitch go… she hungry. this movie is hilariously over-the-top. if you can’t tell
already, but that’s ok, that’s what makes it so awesome.
it’s not meant to be taken seriously even though it is still very entertaining
and pretty memorable at the same time yeah f*** you sharknado! f***** hate you,
you’re not cool, you try too hard i f**** hate sharknado, Stupid movie, you dont become so bad its good on purpose, you have to try to be
good…. and then you… suck at it, and then that is what makes it so good. cause you tried, but you
sucked, but its still good… no you try to be bad on purpose
fuck you Sharknado, I fucking hate… I mean look at these characters you
have a nurse whose head is barely hanging on off her neck by a couple of
slaps of skin… thats f****** disgusting but its also pretty fucking awesome at the same
time. who does that? who thinks about that? then you have this Kung-Fu preist. yes a
f***** kung fu priest who is the baddest son of a bitch under the Lord’s name.
don’t believe me? check this shit out fucking awesome until he goes out like a
little bitch… shame. then there’s that goddamned zombie baby. what? a zombie baby?
how? by two zombies fucking that’s how I now have an awkward erection. hell
there’s even a cameo by Peter Jackson himself, who gets slapped. probably for
making the Hobbit movies. Slap the shit out of you, you boring ass piece of shit. in addition
to its awesome characters this movie also has some hilarious scenes. like, you ever
wonder what it would be like if you took your zombie baby to the park? but the best thing about Dead Alive is
the goddamn gore this film is one of the goriest movies
of all time. how gory you ask? well try a thousand gallons of fake blood gory.
what? still no not enough? well I’m glad you asked! “holy shit” is barely an understatement. so
that’s Dead Alive, one of the most underrated zombie movies ever. it’s got
everything, solid story, memorable characters, hilarious scene, beautiful
moments of gore, but the best of all the zombie sex. so definitely check this
one out as it still holds up against time
f*** you Shaun of the Dead you’re an overrated piece of shit and frankly I
get tired of people bringing you up every time someone mentions zomb…. thanks for
watching everyone I’ll be back soon with a new movie or
as always if you have any suggestions please leave them in the comments down
below I’m the gentleman I observe the world so
we can all laugh at it bye bye

3 Replies to “Dead Alive / Braindead (1992) Movie Review”

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