(“Hail to the Chief” playing) Wow. Unbelievable. What an incredible crowd. What great little kids. I wanted to come here because
education is so important, and we want to make sure
that the school is good for you. We think you guys
can go without lunch. You don’t need lunch.
You know you don’t need lunch. And we want to shorten
the school day. ‘Cause we can’t afford
to fund the schools. All right, great.
All right, well, such fun. Wonderful kids. Okay, Bridget, I’m done.
Let’s go. -Uh, sir? Sir?
-Thank you so much. -WOMAN: Excuse me, sir,
-Wonderful time. Great time. No, no, no, no. Sir? Remember? You’re supposed
to read to the kids? All right. Let’s read this. This is an incredible book calledThe Art of the Deal.I filmed this book cover
in a forest. Look at that guy. So handsome. “I call Ivan Boesky. “Boesky’s an arbitrageur. My idea is to hire Steve Rubell
and Ian Schrager…” You guys know who they are. “…the creators of Studio 54
and the Palladium.” What is it, kid? Who are they? They are incredible
real estate guys who owned Studio 54,
and that’s a place where you could doanything.Yeah, “what the heck” is right. -Fake children. Fake children.
-No. We are not! -Fake children.
-No. We’re not fake. Fake children. Play with the kids? What’s fun about them? Now, first off,
you’re the foreman. Okay? You’re
the chief electrician. Now, this is a contract, okay? Now, this guy, he’s
gonna want to take a kickback for everything you do. Now, bring me three yellow ones. The yellows are the illegals
that we hire to do the job that the guys
in workman comp won’t. And that’s the way to treat
an illegal– just throw ’em right on there. So these guys
are gonna do the work. The foreman’s
gonna get a kickback, but he’s gonna have to pay
the Mob guys. Now, the Mob guys,
they talk to me, okay? Only me. This is what’s so much fun about
building– are you kidding me? Oh, no! Oh, no. -GIRL: Let’s build it bigger.
-But this is fine. We can claim insurance on that. See, now, we could just claim
a bankruptcy against the construction costs. Then we can sue
to lower the costs, make $40 million off a building
we don’t even build. Then take my name and just slap it
on the front of this building. We don’t even need
to construct it. And that’s how business works. Now, I’m thinking about creating
a mass deportation program, where we’re gonna take people
who are illegal immigrants, separate them
from their families and ship them
to other countries. What do you think of that? -No. Don’t do that.
-You shouldn’t take them away from their parents. What do I do about that? You could just keep them here. Sir, do you want to go,
or are you, uh…? -Excuse me?
-I’m s… Mike, get out of here. -We’re making beads.
-Sorry, sir. Sorry. Unbelievable. You know, you got
to have a best friend, right? But, boy, they can get
on your nerves. -You know what I mean?
-Yeah. Mike’s always like,
sir, this, sir, that. Oh, sir, don’t do that.
Sir, sir, pull your pants up. -PENCE: Sir, I can hear you.
-All right, good. -Okay.
-Maybe you’ll take the note. Anyway, I want to give you
a friendship bracelet that I’ve made for you. Annabelle, I give you
this friendship bracelet because you’re now
my new best friend and my only best friend
in the world. Everybody else, including the
last person I was talking to, is no longer my best friend. -(Trump clears throat)
-Yes, sir. ♪ ♪ Red light, green light,
one, two, three. Red light! Green light. Red light! (indistinct shouts) ♪ ♪ TRUMP:
Yay, yay, yay. Yay, yay, yay, yay. That’s right.
Watch it, kid. There we go.
You can stay up on it. -Sir. Sir, we have to get going.
-(school bell rings) -What?
-We have to get going, Sir. -I don’t want to go.
-I know, but it’s time to go. -I don’t want to go, Mike.
-But it’s time to go. -I don’t want to go!
-Sir, it’s time to go. -I don’t want to go!
-Let’s go. -I don’t want to go!
-Come on, it’s time. I know you’re having fun,
but it’s time to go. -Come on, let’s go.
-(Trump sobbing) Let’s go, come on. Drop the ball, give the ball
to someone else. -I don’t want to go!
-Give the ball to someone else. -Give the ball to someone else.
-I don’t want to go! Mr. President, give the ball
to someone else. -I don’t want to go.
-Give it to someone else. -Give it to someone else.
-I don’t want to go. -Here. No, no. Don’t do that.
-I don’t want to go. Here. He’s your ball,
thank you. -It’s okay, it’s okay.
-(Trump sobbing) It’s okay. We have to talk to the
president of Argentina. Let’s go. -We have to talk
-I don’t care. -to the president of Argentina.
-I don’t want to go. I don’t want to go! You had a lot of fun. We had a lot of fun. -We had a lot of fun.
-(Trump moaning) Nope. -My friendship bracelet!
-Okay, thank you so much. You’re the president
of the United States. -Let’s go.
-(kids laughing) (Trump groans) -CHILD: See ya.
-You didn’t see that. That didn’t happen. Thank you very much. TRUMP (crying):