“Face the Wall” | Jo Koy : Live from Seattle


I love my kid, but I understand where my mom’s coming from Cause he’s at that age Right when he turned 12 That’s when he just stopped taking care of himself And that’s when I stopped taking care of him Cause that’s what you’re supposed to do when you’re a parent 12? You should know how to brush your teeth now… You know what do to Jo But now that I ignore the fact that he doesn’t brush his teeth I have to… Fucking… Deal with the… The breath… The breath… It… It comes in hot Hot… And he’s breathy when he talks Dad Dad Dad I’m like Jo, what’d I tell you do when you talk to me? What’d I tell you to do…? Face the wall Face the wall and write it down Let me read what the fuck you’re trying to say to me Armpits… Goddamnit Armpits… Smell like chopped onions And I always get mad I’m like Jo, why do I smell it first?! I’m over here… You’re right… Fucking here I grab the deodorant every time Jo, this is all you got to do You just rub it under this armpit, like that… That’s all you gotta do! And now listen to me, here’s the important part… When you go to the other armpit… I want you to go across your mouth… Just dirty! My son’s dirty! He loves it He thinks it’s the funniest thing Still doesn’t know how to sneeze correctly… Are you kidding me?! My friend had a daughter that… The same time I had my son And she’s been cute her whole life When she would sneeze, she’d announce it I gotta sneeze mommy… I need… I need a napkin Her mom would run over with a napkin… Here ya go baby… Put your nose in the… In the napkin I gotta sneeze mom… I gotta sneeze… Fucking beautiful… Glitter When my son sneezes No announcement His face just explodes… Mid-conversation It always happens at the restaurant… Like dad, did you see how many points… And then I still help him I grab a napkin Here, wipe your face Jo… Cuz I’m a good dad Let me do that with my mom when I was a kid Shit… At the dinner table Mom, can you pass the… Are you fucking kidding me? Are your hands broken when you sneeze? When you sneeze, you can’t use your fucking hands? You could not go like that? Now there’s boogers on the chicken! You’re eating all the booger chicken, Josep All of that is yours… Enjoy! Boogers… And chicken Delicious, huh?

100 Replies to ““Face the Wall” | Jo Koy : Live from Seattle”

  1. Lolol I love your stand up so much! I work at a wood flooring mill in Oregon and we all sit and and laugh and repeat your stuff. Thank you so much for the laughs!!

  2. I found Jo's videos on Facebook. I love him. 🀣
    I agree to everything he says.
    I sneeze like that, my mom would probably cut all my hair off. 🀣

  3. Omg… πŸ˜…πŸ€£πŸ˜‚πŸ˜†πŸ˜…πŸ˜ŽπŸ€£πŸ˜‚πŸ˜…πŸ˜†πŸ˜‚

  4. This is literally the only stand-up I’ve actually laughed hard asf to with actual tears in my eyes 🀣🀣🀣

  5. My face explodes when I sneeze too. Always at work, and it echos. And in the distance, I'll hear a 'Bless you'

  6. This is quiet the generic Filipino household. Shows how we deal with life in a strange "pakeng" way. Filipinos are born comic.lol

  7. Omg I’m crying!!’ This guy is hysterical and can relate as I have a son too πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚

  8. My son is 12 now and its when he showers more. Uses deodorant, cologne a lot lol and brushes his teeth more. πŸ˜‚ cause girls are starting to notice him lmao πŸ˜‚

  9. πŸ˜‚πŸ€£πŸ˜…πŸ€£πŸ˜‚πŸ€£funniest men on Earth ! πŸ˜‚Holly shit this guy is too funny 🀣

  10. My dad is full German, my mom is Irish/Scottish….. I would have an ear bleeding if I sneezed like that.

  11. I am laughting so hard but when it ends the music starts. I stop laughting imediatly, it makes me focus like something going on. My heart can't take these changes! It's like a fucking jumpscare.

  12. Omg I came across one of your videos this morning n I'm already in love with u. πŸ˜‚ Been watching your videos allllll day n I just had to subscribe. Keep up the good work πŸ˜‰

  13. Onions… Lmfao are you talking about my 12 yr old.? That's exactly what he smells like.. And his other smell when sweaty is, wet dog.
    My son breathes like Darth Vader with the bad breath.
    This is shower night… Get in the shower, use soap and use a washcloth to scrub your face and neck.
    Out of shower…. Brush your hair and put on deodorant. "ok mom".
    5 minutes later…. Comes to get his tablet.. Hair dripping and not brushed.
    Me.. "did you brush your hair?"
    Yes… "did you put on deodorant?"
    Oh I forgot.,
    Same thing every night.
    I heard Bill Cosby once describe a simalier situation… He called it Brain damage…
    I seriously think puberty's main symptom is just that.

  14. Moms are like that sometimes but im not really sure about it because i lost my mom when I was just 8 years old.

  15. Im laughing cos my rents asleep and yo my abs hurt and Im wheezing fak I cant breathe send help. Im not even finished from the first joke and he rips another one

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