How To Avoid Drama


If you’ve got drama in your life and
you’d like to know how to avoid that drama well this video is for you I’m
gonna be sharing the four things you need to know about how to avoid drama
and live in a stress-free way. If you’re new here my name’s Matthew and my goal is to spark you to think differently soon create new possibilities for
yourself in your life. And I believe in long-term improvement over quick fixes.
So let’s get right into it the first thing you need to do is to not engage at
all I had to practice this this morning because a Facebook post came up and I
totally disagreed with what they were saying I totally wanted to have a go at
them and I wanted to say my piece and why I’m right and all that stuff and I
had to really hold myself back and go is this really what I want because if I do
this if I reply here it’s gonna create drama it’s gonna create a whole big
hoo-ha and it’s not going to actually make a difference what can I do that can
make a difference is a question I can ask and if the answer is nothing then I
really need to drop it unless I want to get involved in a whole drama saga so
when you’re thinking about whether you want to reply to that Facebook post or
whether you want to tell that friend your thoughts on what they’re doing or
something like that the question to ask yourself is is this worth it do you
really want this in your life right now and if the answer is yes then go for it
but at least in the case of the Facebook example I mentioned this morning I
didn’t want to engage and it wasn’t worth my energy to do that
so don’t engage the next thing you need to ask yourself is whose business is
this situation is this your business because if it is then you can do
something about that and that doesn’t create drama but as soon as you get into
anyone else’s business you are churning the drama wheel you’re
churning that cycle of creating problems and the best way to know if it’s your
business is if you can take one action and will resolve the situation or
significantly reduce the situation that’s probably your business otherwise
it’s not and you should just stay out of it is the general advice that I give
myself the third thing you can do is to create a time
and the point of a time buffer is that when you’re all caught up in your
thoughts or your anxiety your feelings about a particular situation like I was
with the Facebook thing one of the things that can work is to write that
angry email or write that angry post or whatever it is and leave it for 24 hours
or leave of 48 hours and after that time go is it worth getting involved here for
what you’re going to talk about is it really worth it and the same thing can
go with a friend if a friend asks you for your opinion on something and you
know that giving an opinion will be contentious you can ask for time to
consider it and maybe 72 hours is the time you need to probably consider it
normally at least in drama situations by the end of 72 hours the drum is
completely going anyway if it isn’t then you can consider do you actually want to
be involved so giving yourself a time buffer can be really helpful and the
final fourth one is probably the hardest and it’s about being honest with the
people in your life about your lack of want to get involved in drama so this is
saying to them things like I really see you want me to be involved in this or
want me to give my opinion I want me to engage in this situation but it’s just
something not something I’m able to do right now I’ve got other priorities and
focusing on and I just getting involved in this situation I don’t think is going
to benefit me right now and that type of honest communication can be really
valuable and really helpful and I really recommend that it can be hard being
honest with people the way I manage those situations is consider some ways I
can say it I might even rehearse a few different options so that when I go into
this situation I have a few options I can pick from based on what’s needed
from me there’s one more bonus tip I have and that’s do a reflective practice
if you do a reflective practice where you’re writing down your thoughts or how
you’re experiencing the world on a regular basis what that’s going to do is
that’s going to allow you to create more mental space so that when you do find
yourself in the situation where you need to make a choice to engage in drama or
to not engage that will help you create more mental space
that will support you in your choices moving forward if this has been helpful
to you and you like to hear more from me please sign up for my email newsletter
there’s a link to that in the description below and until next time
the journey continues

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